Making 2020 Your Year

For years I’ve been just like everyone else- making New Years resolutions only to get lazy and slack off 2 weeks later or forget what I even promised in the first place. Eat healthier, stop cursing so much, do more exercise….blah blah blah. I can bet a million dollars you’re guilty of making these empty resolutions too.

This year, however, I’m determined to do things differently. How? I’m simply not making resolutions.

IF ONLY IT WERE THAT EASY!!!

Instead, I’ve been thinking about my life goals & decisions. The key word being -decision-. Instead of a resolution, promise, or any other adjective you’d like to insert in there, I’ve been trying to look at it all from a different perspective.

While reflecting one day….aka while drinking wine in the shower as my kids yelled from the other side of the locked door….I began to think, what do I really want out of life? What will make me happy in this new decade? What do I want to accomplish that will make me proud in the subsequent decade? Sure I’d love a boatload of money and to eat pizza every day while wearing Louboutins and galavanting the world……but once the buzz from my wine wore off and I actually got to thinking seriously about what I wanted, the ideas came flooding in. “How am I going to keep track of everything?” I thought to myself. My first instinct was to look at Pinterest. Let’s just say I was inundated with inspirational quotes and articles about how to integrate celery juice into your everyday life. No thanks. After a bit of searching, I stumbled upon what appeared to be another mundane article about vision boards. Something in me made me click the article and as I began to read, I could feel my perspective shifting. This particular author talked about how a vision board is simply a place to physically put your ideas. But it’s up to you to manifest them. Sounds easy, right? Cut out a bunch of cool looking pictures, paste them to a poster board, write “Vision Board” with your tween’s glitter gel pens, then voila!! Nope. Nope. Nope….

I once read a quote that said a dream is just a dream until you write it down, then it becomes a goal. But that goal doesn’t become anything more until you put forth actions. That’s when it becomes real. (or something along those lines). My point being, it became clear to me that I could still utilize the ever popular Vision Board, as long as I mapped out a way for me to manifest these goals into reality.

My particular board is still a work in progress….but don’t worry I promise to share it soon….

In the meantime, I’d love to hear feedback from readers. Do you have a vision board or something similar? Does it help you to accomplish your goals?

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Here are some steps that I’ve found truly helped me thus far:

  1. Ask Yourself What You Really Want

It’s that simple. If you don’t know where to start, try grabbing a blank piece of paper and jotting down everything that comes to mind when you envision your ideal life. Nothing is off limits here (except maybe a rainbow unicorn lol).

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2. Compartmentalize your Ideas

Placing your ideas into categories (ie: friends, family, personal development, health, money, travel) will help you map out the areas upon which you should focus on. After all, the law of attraction can’t work if you don’t know what you’re asking for.

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3. Create Action Steps

Similar to a wealth management advisor mapping out a financial plan, you can do the same with you life. Start small and think about how each day (or month, or year) you are going to attain that. I know in my goals, a big one was travel, so I started with one long weekend trip, then one extended family trip, working my way up to an international trip that involves intense planning & saving.

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Some Important Things to Remember:

  1. NO ONE IS JUDGING YOU.  I know it’s hard to believe because in today’s society there are no secrets and there is no discretion. People can be down right crude to one another. But guess what? This vision board & these goals- they’re YOURS. No one is going to see them unless you share them, and even if you do decide to share and the particular person(s) don’t agree….well fuck them…seriously. No one on this earth can tell you that what you want out of YOUR life is wrong. Always remember that.

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2. IT’S A WORK IN PROGRESS. Your visions & goals do not have to be static. Just as you grow and change, so will they. Don’t feel pressured to have to complete something the original way you wrote it down or envisioned it just because. Trust in yourself and your journey this life has given you. It’s ok to always be a work in progress. I feel like I am. b2cf4e799298e54e6dae4a22f8d7fd56

3. BE AUTHENTIC. This personal road map, or vision board, or mission, or goals, whatever you prefer to call it, is for only YOU. Try to let go of society’s norms and be authentic to what you want and what your heart tells you. Sounds a bit corny, but it’s true. As mentioned earlier, the Law of Attraction can only work if you put something out into the universe- so put out what YOU WANT….not what society tells you that you should want.

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At this point I believe I’ve covered how you and I can both work together to make 2020 OUR YEAR. Even if the only thing we do is create a vision board. 

 

xoxo Robin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rabbit Rabbit

Note: I originally wrote this post ON FEB 2nd….but figured it was still worth it to post since there’s 2 weeks left in February to work on my goals. There were consistencies including snow days and children being sick too….sigh…

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Have you ever heard someone ring in the new month by saying, “Rabbit Rabbit” ? If not, it’s an old English tradition said to bring  luck throughout that month. For myself, I say, “sayonara January” and, “Helloooo February!”. The last few weeks were filled with snow days (both at school & work), doctor visits, illnesses for the kids, and some minor financial hiccups. Between the Polar Vortex stopping and Punxsutawney Phil NOT seeing his shadow…..bring on Spring! Or at least, bring on a month that gets us closer to Spring.

With that said, with each month I try to focus on a few small goals which over the course of 12 months should add up to larger ones.

My goals for February are as follows:

  1. Financial: This is an ongoing struggle as a working mom. Make money: check….make enough to justify daycare: FAIL. Regardless, my goal for this month is to save a little money from each paycheck, even if it ends up only being $5 a week. Something is better  than nothing, right?
  2. Self Care: Another ongoing theme in the balance of life. This is an important one though. My goal this month is to take baby steps and try something new in terms of self care- such as the recently opened salt cave nearby or finally signing up for that spin class I’ve been talking about for 6 months.
  3. Relationships: I’ve been noticing lately a bit of disconnect with my close family. It is sometimes hard to comprehend how you can live with 4 other people and feel disconnected, yet we are always on the go and rarely relaxing and spending genuine time together. Electronics have a lot to do with that as well. My goal for February is to take time out to unplug and have a sit down family meal or do something we love as a family, such as our hikes or Hudson Valley excursions. Maybe we’ll get crazy and even through a family game night in the mix  😉
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What are your goals? This is about the time where people give up on their New Years Resolutions too, so don’t beat yourself up if you’ve stopped going to the gym every day or said a couple f-bombs. Remember, each day is a NEW DAY, and a NEW CHANCE.

Wishing you a wonderful weekend,

 

XO Robin

Mommies are Humans Too

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“Mom I need you”

“Mommy I’m hungry”

“Mom can you help me with my shoes?”

Mommy, MOMMY, MOMMMMMYYYYYY

I hear that about 30 trillion times a day. If you’re a fellow mom, I bet you do too.

Now let’s switch gears. When talking to others, instead of introducing myself as “Robin”, I tend to say, “Hi, I’m _______’s mom”.

AND 9 times out of 10, whether I’m with my children or not, they become the sole focus of my conversation.

With that said, I believe it’s safe to assume that my children take up 99.9999% of my time both physically and mentally. But, is .000009% enough energy to allocate to myself? Probably not.

Make that Definitely not.

And…..that’s where we as moms need to make a change. No, we shouldn’t slack off as parents, or spend less time or energy on our children. We love them more than anything and want to make these years memorable. But in all honesty, we can’t forget who we are as people. Our roles are not singular.

This brings me to the main point of my post. When do we as moms (or dads!!!) stop remembering who we are, what we enjoy, what our hopes and dreams are……and put all of that aside to be known only as “so and so’s mom/dad”?

This topic is a difficult one and a sensitive one, but nonetheless, important. It’s something I have been truly struggling with over the last year.

HOWEVER, you and I alike, do not need to wallow or give in and think, “well, being a mom is the only important job in my life”, because IT’S NOT. So, I challenge you (as I challenge myself) to start by making a list of all your hopes and dreams. Sounds corny, I know. But it really isn’t. These dreams, or goals, could be as small as making time to eat breakfast in the morning or as large as a big career change. Then, after making this list, get together with a friend, family member, colleague, professional, or anyone else you feel comfortable with, and map out how you can get started working towards these goals. It doesn’t matter if you only make one ounce of progress, as long as it’s forward progression, it will help you. Good luck friend, I know we can do it!

xo Robin

PS- I’d love to hear from some of you as to what your ideas

and dreams are & what your plans look like. I’ll be sure to post mine too!

 

Challenge Day 1

Here I am at Day 1 of my 10 Day Positivity & Productivity Challenge. (Yes, I was supposed to start yesterday, but life happens, lol). Today’s instructions are for me to take some time to envision my dream life and what steps I need to take to get there.

“Pshhhh, this is going to be easy” I thought to myself this morning. It was 6:50am and I was sitting at my desk listening to my husband snore a few feet away. I began by breaking out my favorite journal and pink pen (what can I say, I was a 90’s kid and get easily excited by neon pens). First I decided to break up my “dream life” into categories. I’ve always been pretty clear on what I wanted family wise- a loving husband {Check},  and three to four children {Check}. In terms of my education category, I wanted to receive a higher education bachelors degree {Check}, masters degree {Check}, PHD- something I’d still like to achieve a few years down the road, once I’m solid in my area of study. Now comes the tough part of my “dream life”: the “everything else” category. This includes my travel desires, personal development expectations (ie: learn another language, learn to play an instrument, be confident in who I am as a woman), living situations (ie: type of home and where I want to life), and anything else miscellaneous (ie: join the circus……I’m joking…..I hate clowns lol). This last category proved to be the most difficult. I thought about it for 10 minutes before getting up to take care of my family and prepare them for the school / work day. After things had settled, I went back to my journal to complete the task at hand. It was fairly simple to complete the dreams, but not so much the steps on how to get there. That was when it dawned on me. This isn’t a static document, but one that can change with time. Sure the large dreams will stay the same, but the details can be worked out as I go along.

Overall, I have to say that this exercise was one that I truly enjoyed. It put a smile on my face to see in writing what I had accomplished, and made me excited for all the wonderful times ahead.

xo Robin